Your Are Not Alone

Changes in the child’s life

A child with an incarcerated parent faces significant life changes. The best scenario in this difficult situation, is continuing to live at home with only one parent to care for them.

The reality for some children can be more overwhelming as they may end up with different living arrangements.

Through the insights, tips and other resources we share in this post, we want to remind children in this situation that they are not alone. 

How are kids feeling

A child who has an incarcerated parent may feel very emotional. In turn, many don’t know how to cope with the situation. However, children with a support network can turn anger, shame, lack of confidence, and grief into resilience and hope for the future.

Note For Parents And Caregivers

To cope with the changes, many children with incarcerated parents will want to do what they feel is right. Owning how they deal with change feels empowering to them.

Children with a support network to turn to can change anger, shame, lack of confidence and grief into resilience and hope for the future.

Tips for kids

RIGHT NOW

1. Take a break: If you try to power through the frustration it will only leave you more stressed.
2. Go outside: Changing your surroundings can help reduce your stress.
3. Take deep breaths: This one is so simple and so effective, it’s a shame more of us don’t breathe to reduce stress. Here is a link to breathing exercises (includes a printable link): https://childhood101.com/fun-breathing-exercises-for-kids/

HELPFUL HABITS

4. Exercise: Regular exercise can help your brain better deal with stress. Here is a link to a cool workout from Arthur from PBS Kids: http://pbskids.org/arthur/health/fitness/workout-time.html
5. Meditate: Tap into your inner monk. Meditation can take many forms. Simply doing light stretching, deep breathing, Yoga, or Tai Chi can help. Here’s a helpful link on meditation from The Chopra Center: https://chopra.com/articles/3-kid-friendly-meditations-your-children-will-love

PROCESS YOUR THOUGHTS OVER TIME

6. Keep a diary: Record your thoughts and feelings, this can benefit you in many ways. As you journal, you will grow your writing skills. When you are reunited with your parent, you can share with them what you experienced. A diary helps you to reflect on your day and your life and this is a proven technique to help us overcome stressful situations.

7. Write the questions you have: Write down all the questions you have and start to work through them slowly. If you can, ask the adults in your life for help in answering your questions. Here is a template you can use.

8. Seek advice: Sometimes it is important to seek advice instead of doing it alone. 

DISCOVER YOU

9. Think outside the box: Don’t shut down and shut out life. Challenge yourself to participate in different activities and learn new things. Open your mind to new (and positive!) experiences.
10. Find a creative outlet: Trying new things means that you can find ways to  express how you feel. Creative classes at school, sports, church and community activities can help you to express your feelings and channel your energy positively.

Kids, here is a printable list of these tips for you to download and print out. When you feel overwhelmed with the changes you are facing, take a few moments to read these tips, then select one to help you refocus.

Building Families Together offers several programs to support incarcerated individuals and their families. If you want more information on our services, check out  our Services page of our website. If you have questions about what we shared in this post and about our services, please use our Building Families Together contact form. You can also email us at connect@buildingfamiliestogether.org or call (630) 465-4268. Connect with us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram through the links at the top of this page.